Does Mayo Belong on a Grilled Cheese?

By: Alayna Smith

While many are blissfully unaware of this debate and have been enjoying their grilled cheese without thoughts of strange condiments being added, grilled cheese enthusiasts world-wide have been arguing about whether or not mayonnaise should be used when making grilled cheese for decades. Now unless you’re a cold, heartless monster, you probably have a lot of questions, and with good reason. Who came up with something so vile? Why would someone go through with this? What kind of savage animal would taint a perfectly good grilled cheese with mayonnaise?

In order to somehow grasp what goes through the mind of such a person who would casually replace smooth butter with something as off-putting as mayonnaise, I decided I should try it for myself. For the greater good I pushed my morals aside and prepared two grilled cheese, one with butter and one with mayonnaise. 

The cooking process was surprisingly similar for both sandwiches, taking around the same amount of time to reach their signature golden-brown crisp. I had layered both with the same kind and amount of cheese to ensure an equal trial. At first glance you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference, it’s unsettling how innocent the egg based imposter could appear. Faster than I would have liked, the time had come to sample both a comforting, familiar sandwich, and what can only be described as a potential beast.

The homestyle butter slathered grilled cheese was just as satisfying as it always has been. A smooth, classic side to complement any soup or a familiar snack to be enjoyed on its own. Truly a gift to the culinary world.

Then came the infamous wolf in sheep’s clothing. A sandwich from the mind of the devil himself. An idea formed by only the most fiendish being to walk this Earth. To my surprise it carried that same crispiness as any other grilled cheese and the texture of course was not something to be feared. And the flavor, well, in all reality it was nearly the same, save amplifying the sharpness of the cheese a bit. Inferior to its buttery counterpart in my opinion but I suppose to some it may satisfy. However, for the sake of the article, it was an abomination.

In the end, it isn’t so much the mayonnaise or the grilled cheese itself but the concept behind it that throws me off. Again I ask, why? What made someone choose to substitute butter with something so strange?

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